Harmonious Love in a Relationship part 4

Can Your Relationship Withstand the Test of Time? The 4 C's

Connection-

Do you feel an intangible yet compelling attraction to the other person? Aside from physical attraction, lust or magnetic desire, that are important, a connection also manifests as consistent (daily) pervasive thoughts and feelings about the other person and the resulting important relationship you share. These thoughts and feelings evoke support, desire and the inspiration to live life to the fullest.

Simply: Is the strength of your relationship greater than the sum of your strength as individuals?

Compatibility- Do you share a life dream? Do you have similar opinions on how to walk your life path, Do you share laughter and passion? Do you have ways to deal with your differences i.e. Are you reasonably comfortable with your "uncomfort abilities"? Are you compatible on the most important things, especially how you deal with the troublesome incompatibilities?

Simply: Do you like and love your partner?

Communication-Do you communicate respect and acceptance to your partner regularly and avoid rude and defensive communication as much as possible? The best communication tip is to avoid conveying anything that is over-flavored with superiority, over-control, judgment, insensitivity, dishonest strategy, rudeness or negativity. We quite simply react poorly to these attitudes and they cause separation instead of unity.

"words spoken in anger, instead of resolving differences
only create new ones"- Oksana

Another good tip is to make sure resentments are spoken instead of hidden or they will fester and chip away at any good commitment/ foundation of a relationship. The object is to talk about the resentments assertively without blaming or complaining.

Simply: Does your communication with your partner help you know your inner self better and are you grateful for the vulnerability you experience in your partner's presence?

Commitment: Aside from addiction, adultery and abuse are you both committed/ devoted to resolving any and all challenges together? (And that is a yes or no question).

Do you trust each other's words to be consistent with actions? Do you instinctively consider your partner's needs when making decisions?

Simply: Can you depend on your partner. Can you trust your partner to care for you as much as him/her self?

To score 100% on these 4 relationship qualities deserves a monument in the Smithsonian..... and the bottom line is that the sum of all our conscious and subconscious behaviors and attitudes will result in unity or separation.

Addiction: a state of dependence that harms /has a damaging effect.

We require emotional fuel- Emotions are like food -Without feelings we will die. Relationships are the source of our feelings because other people reflect qualities in our selves that nourish or deplete our souls. So we have the choice of being nourished through, healthy clean and vital relationships that eventually lead to enlightenment or through junky, toxic experiences that lead us to soul suffering. Again, it is our health condition or the desire to change our health condition that determines the quality of our relationships. Toxic relationships are mostly motivated by fear and pain and rarely stand the test of time.